Saturday

Hey baby:

It’s Saturday, and I figure I’d try this writing thing again. Irish is having his visit downstairs, it’s rare that I have the room to myself for a couple of hours. Breakfast was disgusting. Two guys are fighting over a tray of food or something. I dunno. Not my problem. I’m starting to sleep better, most through the night.

On a very serious note for a sec. Promise me you’ll do what I say for this. It’s been giving me massive anxiety for the past couple of days/nights. In the Pink Room, between the mattress and the box spring, is the transcript from my case. JUST THROW IT OUT. DON’T READ IT. PLEASE. I haven’t even read it. I want to start fresh with you. I’m afraid you’ll read it and never talk to me again. I’ll be atoning for this for the rest of m life. I relive the last couple of years every night, all night. Hopefully a new country will help us find each other again. I just wish I could verbalize this request. I’m working on it. I have to say writing to ou is helping me just take things that are in my head, and put them on paper.

You know you’ve been here too long when the coffee “isn’t too bad…” For the most part, the food isn’t too bad. It neither fills you up, or leaves you hungry. I’ve been in the state of “meh, I could eat”. I guess there’s no easy way to take the little pine tree, huh? I thought of that last night. Also, thinking last night, maybe after asking we can stay in the camper at my parent. It wouldn’t be the best, but at least it wouldn’t be in the same living space. At least for a bit.

On that note; I can’t wait to [redact]fuck you[/redact] again. [redact]Pushing into you[/redact] is going to feel so amazing. [redact]Ripping your shirt off[/redact] and [redact]throwing you down[/redact] on the bed, and just [redact]taking you[/redact] is going to be so goooood. [redact]Pulling your hair, biting you, and making you scream. Mmmhmm.[/redact] [redact]Annnd I’m hard[/redact]. I love you so much.

You know, I love to talk to you on the phone, but I’m having fun writing to you. God, my handwriting is nasty though! It’s been a while since I’ve written this much. I see why you like to write so much. As I’ve written the last letter and this one, I don’t know how to explain it, I just feel a little better. I’m sorry the letter doesn’t seem coherent. I haven’t mastered stream of consciousness quite yet! I’m actually surprised I’ve written this much, to be honest.

They haven’t switched out the library cart since last Monday. Times are getting desperate. Monday though, I was smart, and grabbed A CLASH OF KINGS. It’s a good book, if you skip all the BRAN chapters. Hopefully on Monday they’ll switch them out for fresh books. I did read a really good one called GOING SOMEWHERE – a couple of bike rides across the USA. I enjoyed that, and for about 20 minutes thought we could do that across Canada. Nahh! HaHa!

So Bosnia got a Muslim prayer rug yesterday. He didn’t even know which direction East was. We didn’t even know he was Muslim. It honestly looks like a welcome rug to a bathroom mat! Also, did you know they have, what I call “Spanish Survivor” on Telemundo? It’s 2 teams of 6 I think, and it’s obstacle courses! It’s on every night. But during the days, it’s movies or telenovelas.

It’s looking to be a pretty mellow Saturday here.

I love you so much, and miss you so much it hurts.

I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

I love you baby <3